Who knows how to raise a sexually healthy child? Do we have these conversations in our churches? How do we bring up pure children in a culture that starts to sexualize them even before they can read and write? Many of us were raised ourselves with minimal information about sexuality and sexual intimacy and this had consequences of course, but the consequences were minimal compared to what our children will face if we do not stop the silence. The sexual climate today is different – very different.
God put boundaries in place to keep us safe and when we disregard His guidance, there are consequences. Many of us have experienced negative consequences after making bad sexual choices – but are we warning the young people about theses consequences? Sixty years ago there were literally only two STD’s to worry about, today there are over twenty and some with hundreds of different strains. Some can be with you forever, others can cause infertility and even death. This fact alone is enough to tell us that the culture’s so-called ‘sexual liberation’ has left the world more confused and broken than ever before. Child on child sexual abuse is at epic proportions all around the world. Children are being sexually abused by adults every day and there are there are 116, 000 requests for child porn – DAILY (Barna group research, 2016). I call upon the church and christian parents to join with us in protecting vulnerable children in a time such as this.
The greatest threat to our children today is pornography. It trains the viewer to be a consumer and not a lover. It is creating a culture of objectification, where people will see other people as mere objects – this is the foundation of a world where sex trafficking will thrive.
Internet pornography has changed everything and science is backing it up every step of the way; pornography is the public health crisis of our generation and our children are the ones who will and are suffering the most as a result. The social tolerance of pornographic imagery and footage needs to cease if we are to have a future with healthy marriages and families.
Pornography is changing sexual templates, desires and scripts, it is accessible, available and anonymous. The World Health Organization has officially acknowledged addiction to pornography. The main problem is WHAT it is teaching: unhealthy sexual practices, negligent promiscuity, incest, pedophilia, rape and much more that is too graphic to mention.
SUGGESTED TIPS TO PREPARING AND PROTECTING CHILDREN TODAY:
- PRAY. Pray for your children. Pray for your marriage. Pray for protection and for wisdom.
- If you socialize with families regularly, it is recommended to have a big ‘sit down’ together with all the adults and children to discuss what is appropriate and what is not regarding physical contact. What is a ‘public’ part (eg: arm) and what is a ‘private’ part (eg: bum). This is very important, as most unfortunate situations happen with friends or family, and not particularly with strangers.
- From the moment you give your child a smart device (only recommend from the age of 12) there should be terms and conditions attached. Eg: regular check ups will be carried out, internet filtering software will be installed for accountability and devices will not be used in bedrooms etc. Our children need to be aware of the negative side effects of technology (eg: pornography). Dumb phones are recommended for children under the age of 12.
- Gaming is a well-known gateway into pornography. Digital addiction is a real threat for our children today and needs to be taken seriously.
- It is recommended that anyone wanting to work with children be interviewed thoroughly, have internet accountability and be verified by the local police.
- Use internet filters and blockers on every device in your home.
- Sleep over parties or visits are not recommended anymore unfortunately, many sexual assaults have occurred during overnight visits. Child-on-child abuse is a genuine concern today, even if it is in your own home! Professionals are calling it what it is: risky.
These changes are sad, but it is sadder if we continue like things have not changed…
SUGGESTED SYSTEM to teach your children for when they see pornography:
It is not a case of ‘if’ your child will see it… it is a question of ‘when’ they will see it.
Pornography is people with little or no clothes on and it is dangerous to look at because it can hurt your head and your heart.
1 When you see it; turn away immediately!
2 Call it what it is: pornography and it is harmful.
3 Talk to a trusted Adult. (Mom/dad)
It is now time for parents and guardians to shout a loud message of Biblical truth; it is the only thing that will stand the test of time in the lives of our children! We need to shout a counter cultural message that promotes purity. If we are serious about protecting the vulnerable we need to start giving our children accurate and Biblical sex education. I want to encourage you that you might not have all the answers to the questions your children have – but you know the one who does! Pray to the Lord Jesus and trust that He will lead you into all truth!
Yours in justice and love,